SCOTCH ~ Some light laugh………..

           On the first day of school, the children brought gifts for their teacher.

 

The supermarket manager’s daughter brought the teacher a basket of assorted fruit.

 

The florist’s son brought the teacher a bouquet of flowers.   

 

The candy-store owner’s daughter gave the teacher a pretty box of candy.  

 

Then the liquor-store owner’s son brought up a big, heavy box. The teacher lifted it up and noticed that it was leaking a little bit..She touched a drop of the liquid with her finger and tasted it.  

 

“Is it wine?” she guessed.       

 

“No,” the boy replied. She tasted another drop and   asked, “Champagne?”

 

“No,” said the little boy………….”It’s a puppy!”

Why parents get grey hair

boss
Image by Cibernya via Flickr

 

The boss wondered why one of his employees was absent but had not phoned in sick. So he dialed the employee‘s home phone number and was greeted with a child‘s whisper.

Hello ? ‘

‘Is your daddy home?’

Yes, he’s out in the garden ,’ whispered the small voice. ‘

May I talk with him?’

The child whispered, No .’ ;

So the boss asked, ‘Well, is your Mommy there?’

Yes, she’s out in the garden too

& The boss asked; ‘May I talk with her?’

Again the small voice whispered, No .’

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, ‘Is anybody else there?’

Yes.’ whispered the child, A policeman. ‘

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee’s home, the boss asked, ‘Well, may I speak with the policeman?’

No, he’s busy. ‘ whispered the child.

‘Busy doing what?’

Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the police dog men.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background, the boss asked, ‘What is that noise?’

It’s a helicopter. answered the whispering voice.

‘What is going on there?’ demanded the boss, now truly worried.

The search team just landed a helicopter.

‘A search team?’ said the boss. ‘What are they searching for?’

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle, Me!

From a Child

Things children will say…………

President’s Day

I was eating lunch today with my 14 year old grandson when his mom asked him  “What is tomorrow?”

He said “It’s President’s Day”

She asked “What does that mean?” …. I was waiting for something profound…

He said  “President’s Day is when Obama steps out of the White House and if he sees his shadow, we have 2 more years of unemployment.”